Number 1: Never Play Favorites.
If you're going to throw up all over Mom, say at 9am while eating breakfast, be sure to pay equal attention to Dad. It's best to wait a while, though (like until 10:15) so that they don't suspect any deliberate attempt at even-handedness. Be sure to get as much vomit on Dad's arm as you got on Mom's chest. If you can toss some goo out your nose both times, that's even better.
Remember that if you don't treat both parents equally today, you'll have trouble later. Well-adjusted parents aren't born, they're made.
Think about it.
If you're going to throw up all over Mom, say at 9am while eating breakfast, be sure to pay equal attention to Dad. It's best to wait a while, though (like until 10:15) so that they don't suspect any deliberate attempt at even-handedness. Be sure to get as much vomit on Dad's arm as you got on Mom's chest. If you can toss some goo out your nose both times, that's even better.
Remember that if you don't treat both parents equally today, you'll have trouble later. Well-adjusted parents aren't born, they're made.
Think about it.
Duck Socks. You love them.
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