Monday, December 08, 2008

And I Hate Victoria's Secret

So I got an email in my Gmail. 20% off your entire order!

And despite the fact that Victoria's Secret has infantilized its stores, offended my sensibilities with its ugly colors (how about 4 different kinds of pink! How about something for grown-ups?), and made it impossible to buy anything without a magnifying glass and a decoder ring because their website is so needlessly complex, I fell for it.

Fifteen painstaking minutes later, I completed the labyrinth of boxes to order 3 sets of stuff in relatively inoffensive colors. Fine. I go to check out.

Boxes, boxes, boxes. I fill out, watching the level on Iain's bottle dropping, knowing that my window to make this thing happen is narrowing. And then, after I enter my Victoria's Secret card number, I get "We're sorry. We're unable to process this order. Please call us for personal service."

Really? Really? So let's review: the economy is in a tailspin. Victoria's Secret revenue is down. Despite this, I decided to accept your desperate offer and buy some of your overpriced merchandise because I need to do it and online is easy. But, as it turns out, you're not really interested in making the website work, or my business. Meanwhile, I didn't want to call you because I have a tiny window while Iain's eating when I can do this stuff. I can't be caught on the phone talking to your salesperson. I just want to get it done.

If this was the first time, I'd be more relaxed, I think. But have you noticed that the companies whose offers are cluttering your in-box are the SAME ones whose websites consistently suck? Like Talbot's, where for years the selection online has been less complete than in stores. What? How can that be? And when you call, the ladies say, "Yes, we know it's terrible." Lo and behold: 30% off and free shipping.

So here's the bottom line (ha! Bottom. That's a pun): Victoria's Secret, Talbot's, etc., will not be getting any more from me. If they can't be bothered to slap together a functioning e-commerce vehicle (something mom-and-pop businesses do all the time), then I can't be bothered to shop with them.

4 comments:

Bart said...

Having spent a few years working in the industry, I was pretty stunned at the amount of money companies throw at networking and e-commerce 'solutions' without really understanding them.

Sure, the Directors get demo machines set up for them to see, but generally speaking, the vast majority of them really have no understanding of how they work, and this makes them more likely to award contracts to people and companies based on factors that in the end have little bearing on whether the 'solution' will be fit for purpose.

Perhaps you could order your panties from JC Penney instead?

;¬)

SarahHub said...

The Sears site was down ALL DAY on Black Friday. We ended up with a new, front-loading, washer and dryer pair from Lowes.

Unknown said...

www.figleaves.com is a better knicker site anyway... and their deals actually work.

Anonymous said...

Agree with Miriam..! Figleaves is really the best and my favorite too.