BAM! (I am the Master)

Charles and I are coming up to our sixth wedding anniversary. For those of you who don't follow these things, that's the one where the traditional gift is iron. Yes, iron.

Now, we already own an ironing board. We already own 2 irons (relics of our life before we were a couple. Right - those irons are more than 16 years old. But hey - they still work, and that's a testament to Black and Decker, friends). We already own enough cast-iron cookware to sink this house when the flood comes. We already own a grill and grill accessories. I tried to sell Charles on new cars, but no luck.

So what to do?

Last week we entertained two couples and when I set the table I had to mix and match our silverware. There was the nicer stuff (18/8 stainless I got at Pottery Barn in 1997 - enough for 4). Then there was the pretty nice stuff (spoons Charles bought at Bed, Bath, and Beyond two years ago because we never had enough spoons for coffee and ice cream). Then there was a remnant of the truly dire silverware we had From Before. I'm pretty sure some of that was...liberated from a dining hall or two.

Now, stainless steel is made from steel. And steel is made from? Iron! So we realized we could solve our social problem and our relationship problem by getting some decent stainless steel. I know most people do this when they get married, but since we eloped we didn't expect anyone to send us presents. Some people did, because they're lovely, but we never registered or asked people to send us housewares - after all, by the time we married we were old. We had a lot of stuff.

You may have heard that we're in an economic downturn. Retailers are freaking out. Sure enough, when I Googled "Reed and Barton Classic Braid service for 8" up popped Macy's.com. And what should my wondering eyes encounter there? Service for 12, half price! But wait - there's more.

In my Gmail box was a coupon code for another 10% off. So in the end, what was once $300 plus tax and shipping magically transformed into a total of $170. Plus, I got serving pieces and a drawer-caddy to hold it all. (I don't need one of those wooden boxes for storage. I have an awesome one covered in 70's era contact paper. When you've got that, mahogany really pales in comparison)

Bow down, mortals. I AM THE MASTER.

P.S. Yes, we bought a joint anniversary gift online. We are not romantic people. (My favorite Christmas gift of recent years was a set of 8 plain, white coffee mugs. Charles knew that I really love it when all the mugs are uniform in color and shape. So he went out and bought me a perfect set of lovely mugs. When I opened them I gasped. Our guests that year must have thought I was utterly mad. But this is what we consider romantic.)